My Wolf wanting Freedom

[Ahroun]

Well, i have some question. But first let me explain something.
I feel much as a wolf. In the beginning was a big problem for me since i tough i was only becoming crazy. But then i accepted and even could <understand> what was goin on. And it was even nice and fine. Was agood thing. I have learned a lot and finally started to now more about myself and getting answears.
Now, it is becoming hard. Sometimes i hardly can control myself. I am starting to feel sad, disapointed, specially as human. My <instincts> are growing stronger and i feel as running away from my life as woman. I got too addicted to woods, to places far away from people.And towards people i really try to understand and accept them, but the most i want distance.
Seems this life and city is taking my life away...
I feel the best at home, and thinking <away>. Imagining i am away from all this. Wondering and wishing. But even my own house, home,doesn't feel anymore like it.
Sometimes i think i am going to leave. I look at the trains passing and i think i am going to take one and run away for good. Far away. Leave this all. Just get somewhere in a mountain and far away from this all...

My question is: Does anyone recognize this? And what do you do in such ocasions?

Regards and thanx for the attention..
Ahroun

[Alphawolf]

I haven't really ever felt that way. Maybe you need to get away from everything for a while to figure out how you want to live your life. Take a kind of holiday in the woods or something.

[Gerulphus]

Now, it is becoming hard. Sometimes i hardly can control myself. I am starting to feel sad, disapointed, specially as human. My <instincts> are growing stronger and i feel as running away from my life as woman. I got too addicted to woods, to places far away from people.And towards people i really try to understand and accept them, but the most i want distance.
Seems this life and city is taking my life away...
I feel the best at home, and thinking <away>. Imagining i am away from all this. Wondering and wishing. But even my own house, home,doesn't feel anymore like it.
Sometimes i think i am going to leave. I look at the trains passing and i think i am going to take one and run away for good. Far away. Leave this all. Just get somewhere in a mountain and far away from this all...
Ahroun

This sound so familiar, you almost describe the way I have been feeling for while. But sadly I haven’t found the solution yet. My time is running out, but I haven’t given up yet.

Don’t give up.

[Xzengrim]

Yeah... I think most of us feel this way at one time or another. I think its a natural part of reconciling one world with another. I think, though, that if your wolf side starts getting uppity, it's most likely more of a symptom of turmoil in your life. You should try reconciling yourself and working things out first. Get the whole inner peace thing going. Cause I don't think you're going to find peace in the mountains. That's just going to cause a whole lot of trouble.
I mean, I feel it too. The city makes me really claustrophobic, and so does the neighborhood. But it's a matter of dealing. Becoming a train hopping hobo is just going to cause more harm than good.

[Ahroun]

Thanx for the replys... It seems i will have to <rethink> all this..
And Gerulphus, i don't wanna look selfish, tought always gives us confort knowing someone feels the same...
Thank you

Ahroun

[wolvenmoonpriestess]

I have definently been there. It has already been said the advice I give... finding peace within yourself. However I think it needs to be done within the enviroment that you are in, because that is the enviroment you are going to be living in.. It takes time and it is frustrating and very emotional experience. Just take some time out right at home and try to recognize and make peace. It has a place in your life, even if you will occassionally get weird looks. Realize that is okay to be different and to be yourself. Just be... and you will find the peace.

wolvenmoonpriestess

[Cape]

Wow. This is EXACTLY how I feel.

I really want to run away. Away from human intervention. but don't know where to go? All i can picture in my mind is this beutiful forest, unlike any i've ever seen. I so yearn to be in this place, but I don't think it exists. I want it to exist so bad, but even if it does i don't think i'll ever find it.


I don't know what to do anymore. I've been getting thoughts of suicide, but i really don't want to kill myself. I would really just like to live how my spirit wants to live: free, and away from the corruption of other people. But I hurt so bad because of this, i sometimes feel that death would be better than going through this pain. I doubt i'll do it though, i still have hope driving me.

[Kishi-Garou]

In time, we have all wanted our solace. To bring peace to ourselves, and our spirits. We all want that haven, yet we cannot find it. I feel it is an inner urge, that will save our lives one day. Though we may be young, no matter how old, we still have our lives ahead of us. Do not kill yourself, for life is beautiful, and who knows, you may not be as blessed in the next life.

Keep true to yourself, your loved ones, and your wolf spirit.

[lordragoon]

I find it's best to just try to find a way to express the animal side. If you've got the time and the money, a vacation is a good cure, but not the only one. Since most people attribute the wolf with their creative urges, I suggest art of some kind. A little bit of writing is a good way to let the animal inside out, and so is painting or music. Any way of seeing the wolf is a great way to deal with it, and you won't lose or weaken that link.

[DarkWolf]

I have felt like that before, and know about twenty or so people who have all felt the same. Funnily enough not a single one of them or me are therianthropes.

The mind can be affected by the mental states and overloads of social life, just to be in your bedroom can seem too stuffy. Open woodland has been the solution for many people wanting that time to think. Don't be so surprised about an attraction, a desire, to running through or to the woods, at least two thirds of all mankind has some level of this in them at some point.

Why do people always assume that wanting to be in the woods, for peace and/or solace as therianthropic? You do realise humans are animals right? Sometimes the modern life can make one feel claustrophobic at times. A short holiday in the woods camping will be all you need to get that quality fresh solitary you seem to need.

Welcome to humanity, not as technological as you thought, huh? I mean the biggest advancements are based on evironmental studies after all.. Humans are still animals too you know. People who forget that, are forgetting what makes them alive.

Answer me this, therianthropes: Why do you think that simply wanting and being thrilled by open woods, etc, automatically makes you seem a therianthrope.. When over 4 BILLION people have/had/will feel the same thing?

[Ahroun]

Dark Wolf

What i most enjoyed for your words is that you really show some respect. You don't look as someone that gives a critic in a destructive way, or that even wants to be <unpolite> or something.
Was really sweet to read this :) And thanx for the way it was...

You ask:<Why do you think that simply wanting and being thrilled by open woods, etc, automatically makes you seem a therianthrope..>
Well, on this topic i am explaining something i feel, but that do not necessary shows <the other side of me>. Cause that same other side i discovered because of <body reactions> i got, and not because of a passion for woods or Nature itself. That same passion i always had, but never before i have ever associated with <being wolf>.

Just to enumerate one or two things that make me feel <this>, is the fact i suddenly (and knowing nothing about wolves, or without ever in my life see a film or read a book about werewolves ->What i still do't do)
had spontany <body reactions> when for example, someone would take my bord. Man, was like <silly> even to myself, when at work someone did that.Everyone was surprised, but i think i was it the most :rolleyes:
With time my ears also started to react to sounds, for example, special like when someone beats with a fork in a glass or som. Automaically my ears go up, and some sounds can be so terribly <deep> that it seems like hurting the ears! :p In this room, for example, it is a constant, since i always have the window a bit open (what is very nice for me to know <<what's outside>>
Also the smell was very fast developed, and i can feel them before anyone (at least those i know). Even today at dinner i was telling i felt a smell, everyone was telling i was crazy cause all doors were open. Still i went to find out and we found what it was.
I always recognize too what i want to eat using the smell, for example, even if the food is still on the packs, for example.
I also developed Hunting feelings and wishes (and that is the most hard to accept). Often <images> crossed my mind, i even got shcked with myself (but no, they never included attack people or something). An example: Once i saw a chicken (and was good used to them before) but suddenly i <saw> as if myself eating it just like that. To be stoped and then attack, grab it, have it in my mouth, walk a bit, lay down, and eat it. As if in hungry before, and in the end mostly tasting it... (I must confess when i <woke up> this was shocking, since i always loved animals and never even dared to make them any bad).
Also in the evenings when i was in bed, i started (don't ask why cause i dunno), making sounds, as a <wolf with hunger> (this is for you to have an idea what for sounds it was). I noticed i did them when i was thinking of an hard situation.
More... i felt the urge of having the control of things and impose order around. Specially in my sex life, it was an extreem and radical changed.

...


Well, this are a couple of things. I dunno if you will understand them or not. Maybe for you is nothing but a good psyco explanation, or that a doctor would help me. Probably. But i only found out what a therion was, after i was in huge <doubt and questioning myself> why in Gods name i was behaving like that.

Am i clear? Was this enough, what i told you?

A big hug for you
Ahroun

[Cape]

well, i was going to type something, but Ahroun summed up pretty much what i was going to say pretty good.

btw, i know exactly what you mean with the wanting to eat animal day dream type thing. at first i was pretty disgusted by it, but i've learned to just accept the images that i got in my head, and just don't let myself impulse on them.

to the person who suggested i do some sort of art: i'm already planning on that, actually. i would really like to write something about this forest that keeps appearing in my mind.

i've been thinking about just running off into the forest and attempt to live out the rest of my life there, but i really don't want to be completely alone. to tell you the truth, i've been thinking about trying to find some sort of Therianthrope community, which is just a bunch of therianthropes that live together, outside of normal society. i think it would help me a lot to be physically around others like me.

[sno raven]

My question is: Does anyone recognize this? And what do you do in such ocasions?


I don't want to be mean or anything, but it seems like your going through a depression period. And the wolf inside is just making it worse. Because you probably don't know what to do with all of it.
Now I haven't felt this way, but I do know how animals feel when they feel lonely and confused. Just hang in there. Is it that you'd rather be alone, or just away from people? Try going to a nature park or a zoo... theres bound to be animals! I too would rather spend my time being with an animal then come in contact with people (though I don't mind it, I don't seem to have an effort to do it often.)
Maybe take a camping trip with your family or friends. Just remember, if you truely love them, and don't want to loose them, try to keep in contact with them. Unless they shun you off, theres no reason to avoid family and friends. Because if something should ever happen, they'll be there. And even in the wolf society, family is very important.

[Dreamcatcher]

To reconcile both halves of ur soul:
1. Take time
2.Listen to the needs of both halves
3. Act accordingly

-Maybe you should move someplace a bit out of town..
near wildlife, but also consider what U would be leaving behind!
Do not act on impulse..think stuff through b4 you do them!
*Hope I helped*

[silenceowl]

it has been i dream of mine to live in the woods by a large lake in the canadian wilderness for about 3 years now. i know what you feel i feel it every night i just want to leave and live my life free. and i do plan to do it in a couple of years just as soon as i can get away from my familiy. my advice is do what you are going to do live you life and dont look back make you choices and go with them.

[Rever]

Originally Posted by Ahroun

My question is: Does anyone recognize this? And what do you do in such ocasions?




I live in a city now too, and know what your talking about. Something I do is go out when its late at night. Somewhere where I don't see a lot of people, and then I listen and try to feel the city. ( If you know what I meen.) You seem like your missing the natural beat of the woods, lost its beat in the city.

Normally this will come from social problems. Depression, basicly to much stress. You simply need a recharge. Let me know if it works for ya.